So this is why Beyonce and Kate Middleton always
look so zen: Powerful people are happier because they feel more
authentic, according to a new study published in the journal Psychological Science.
To reach that conclusion, investigators conducted online
surveys in both the US and Israel. They found that dispositional power
(feeling that you’re in control and have a level of power) predicted
happiness. In fact, the link held up across several different facets of
life, including an individual's career, relationship, and friendships.
So how do these pros balance power and
happiness? The study showed that feeling powerful also makes you feel
more authentic. Basically, being a big deal (or at least thinking you
are) makes you more likely to be true to yourself. When you feel
powerful, you’re less worried about the opinions and evaluations of
others, says lead study author Yona Kifer, a doctoral candidate at Tel
Aviv University. Essentially, you stop trying so hard to impress
everyone.
Not planning to become a CEO or celebrity anytime soon?
You don’t necessarily need to be in a position of power to reap the
benefits. “In fact, perceived power may be more important than actual
power,” Kifer says. Here, sneaky ways to score more authority in all
areas of your life:
De-Clutter Your Space. If your desk is looking like a scene from Hoarders,
tidy it up for a boost of control. “When your desk is cluttered, that
causes stress and makes us feel helpless, which is the opposite of
perceived power,” says Elizabeth Lombardo, PhD, author of A Happy You.
For a quick fix, pick up a desk caddy and cord organizer. Then, add a
few storage bins to your space, so that you can keep the less essential
work out of view.
Focus On What You Can Control. If
you’re drowning in paperwork and feeling totally helpless during the
week, take five minutes to think about how you’ll spend your next day
off. Downton Abbey marathon? Brunch with your guy? “Focusing in
on that sense of control, you’ll start to feel like you do have power
that you were taking for granted,” Lombardo says.
Be The Social Planner. Even if you’re
generally the go-with-the-flow friend in your social circle, stepping up
now and then can make you more satisfied with your friendships. Pick
out the next happy hour spot, or sign you and your friends up for a new
fitness class. “It allows you to have the power in terms of coming up
with new ideas, and you get the chance to do things that you’re really
interested in,” Lombardo says. That increases power and authenticity for a double happiness boost.
More from Prevention: 3 Ways To Handle Rejection
Practice Speaking Up. Exuding
authority at work requires some effort. To feel (and look!) more
powerful, follow the lead of your outspoken peers. The key: Bring up a
relevant point that you’re actually passionate about—like the results of
a new project you’re working on—instead of just speaking to be heard.
“That way, you’re exhibiting your power as well as being authentic,"
Lombardo says.
Boss Him Around (A Little). In this research, feeling power in your bond was associated with happiness—but that doesn’t mean you have to call all
the shots. Just having the control to suggest new things—like choosing a
date spot or trying something extra-special in bed—can boost your
perception of power in the relationship, Lombardo says.
Own Up To Relationship Mistakes. Just
as crucial: Taking responsibility for rough spots, no matter who is at
fault. “When [we're] unhappy in a relationship, we often disempower
ourselves by saying it’s all their fault or wishing he would do this or
that," Lombardo says. Instead, focus on the one thing you can
change—yourself. “Realize your role in the discontent and think of what
you can do to change it.”
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